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Welcome to the new millennium (continued)

I'm sure those people of 3000 A.D. will all have better bandwidth and cooler toys. But I'm just as sure that men still won't understand women, that women'll still love sugar and spice and everything nice, that everyone will love and laugh and play and care and cry. But if we (and they) do it right, the people of Y3K will all be healthier, wealthier, and wiser.

See, we often look back at the good old days. And in some ways, they were good. But we've improved ourselves and our race immeasurably over the last thousand years despite the fact that, physically, we've evolved relatively minimally. Oh, no question, we've fucked up. The Thousand Year Reich sure didn't make it. Neither did outhouses, zoot suits, and disco.

But, as we glance back over that time, we can also look at our incredible achievements. The flush-toilet, for instance. What a wonderful invention! And Bruce Willis in Armageddon, perhaps the best movie of all time (but that's probably because I'm partial to the scene where Paris gets squashed). And fajitas. And DVDs. And ice cubes. Ice cubes are cool. These are a few of my favorite things.

However, we can look back and also be proud of the less tangible stuff: kicking a basketball sized object into space and dropping it on another planet; defeating the bad guys; creating rule of law; coexisting, for the most part, successfully; recognizing our mistakes and trying to make good; caring for those who can't care for themselves; exposing Milli Vanilli for the lip-syncing frauds that they were; and, of course, creating the Internet.

What can we look forward to as we look ahead? I could turn this into a commercial and tell you that you'll see many more incredible issues of this magazine and you'll see many more exceptional magazines from ZATZ: Pure Internet Publishing. But I won't. (OK, I did, but I just told you what I could've told you. It's not as shameless this way.)

Seriously though, I think and I hope that as we look to the future, we have much to look forward to. For the most part, we've turned out to be a pretty good bunch of creatures. The majority of us get along pretty well and do pretty fine things.

And, once in a while, we do some absolutely jaw-dropping, historically unbelievable, mind-bogglingly incredible things. These are the things that make us proud to be part of the human race. These are the creations of incredible beauty, the achievements of astounding engineering, the acts of incredible bravery, the feats of unimaginable fortitude.

These are the things that blow our minds and ignite our imaginations. And we have another thousand years to look forward to. Ain't it grand?

I'll see you in the next millennium! Remember, as I write this, it's the old millenium. When you read it, it'll be the new millenium. My words have carried over a millenium. If that don't sound pompous as all heck. Yet it's so cool!

Party on, dudes and be excellent to each other!

Product availability and resources
To read up on Karen Carpenter, and for more song lyrics, go to http://members.aol.com/_ht_a/dononeness/music1/.

For more information on the Milli Vanilli scandal that rocked the '80s, check out http://www.geocities.com/Hollywood/Lot/6448/milli.html.

Bulk reprints
Bulk reprints of this article (in quantities of 100 or more) are available for a fee from Reprint Services, a ZATZ business partner. Contact them at reprints@zatz.com or by calling 1-800-217-7874.

David Gewirtz is Chairman and Editor-in-Chief of ZATZ: Pure Internet Publishing. With the fine ZATZ team, he publishes PalmPower, DominoPower, and Windows CE Power Magazines. He's also the author of The Flexible Enterprise and Lotus Notes Revealed! He can be reached via email at david@zatz.com.




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